There is never a 100%

...of anything.

"There's is nothing totally good or bad", I said as I hugged her.

It's been a strange day, or rather June has taken a serious turn in things that have to whisk me off my trajectory of life once again. I think back, looking at my blessing while things... go on. It isn't mundane or anything, in fact, it's good, perhaps alittle too perfect that made me question... stuff.

Back to the title, it was after a talk where I dig deeper, about what's good and what's back and I realized the whole textbook cliche comes full circle; nothing is perfect. Nothing is, definitely. Likewise in any relationships, be it platonic or romantic, there isn't anything that's all good or all bad. You could be all cuddles in one moment, and clawing each other out in another.

Such is life, isn't it? As I ran my thoughts across the philosophical teachings from the stoics. Know what messes you up, but also know that those are the things that would eventually make you who you are. But then again we all definitely have control in what we think and feel from things. To take the lesson that isn't actually a blessing in disguise, but just as literal as a lesson.

I think this is a mindset that I should have learnt a long time ago. As a pessimist, I'm always dwelling on the face of that coin that's facing down in any coin flips. The glass is never full, I'm never fully human, I'm always broken, never enough; like the glass. However, to give it a bit more perspective, I am not YET full, there is water STILL, and there is room for something else; I am capable of having MORE.

It might be a simple mantra, but I guess this is what would eventually work for me. This small detour of a relapse would set me stronger, and perhaps I have to find a way to embed my life into something else, into working together, into being stronger, into being able to conjure more discipline when I'm not alone and when I am. I should learn to communicate, for running away from the world doesn't make the world go away, but you're the one leaving everything else.

I took a breather, and think about the times where likewise, I hate it when things aren't perfect. When I felt failure is the absolute disaster, that spells the end or worse. I felt it was worse then closure because failure is you being not able to. I think we shouldn't let bad things crippled us, but only make us stronger in ways that we should always have more rights than wrongs to tip the scales to our favour. And if we ever have more wrongs, we have a lifetime ahead of us, to do more rights. And not running away would eventually allow us to.

Head down straight and fast. Undo the truth that you'd been withholding. There is the whole world out there waiting to embrace you. Be courageous for change, dare to dream and to become. The future awaits; and your glass would eventually be full.

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